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My back aches…
Eyes are stretched, sleep deprivation is high on charts tonight…
Soul is weighing heavier than my body….
Mind is scattered, bits of it, covered in the dust of yesterday, bits of it languishing in the illusion created by time, called ‘present,’ bits of it stay idle in wake of a ever-approaching future….
There are no dark clouds, no moist-cool-breeze, yet I feel monsoon is right up there, hovering above my cracked head…..
Words swimming all around me, I hate them, in an instance, I seek refuge in them, in an instance, they are the reason for all to go wrong, perhaps the reason to set things slightly right….
The clock says 4 am; I have nothing to do with time…
At this moment, in this phase, I don’t want to be where I am, my place is not decided yet, my path has got lost in my head, my head’s got lost in the soul-searching business, the quest seems to be going nowhere, there is still some hope left somewhere….
Nothing around me has changed, same room, same colour on the walls, same curtains, same view outside, same bed, same dust-laden table, same broken chair, same air of nothing-ness, its all the same…..
It could be over, today, all of it, it could drag on forever, it would linger, with no end, it will remain…. Suffocating, breaking, melting, drowning…..
Not much to look back at, not much to look ahead at, not much to treasure today…..
Music plays on, repeats itself, I don’t know the lyrics, the beat is familiar, it runs, keeps running, forming a part of my thought, I want to change the track, yet I play the same one, for don’t know how long….
………Blank spaces, cluttered confusions, deep voices, forgotten letters, misplaced identity, all over the place, no one point of certainty….. Staccato Passage, this is what it is….