This is no official business...

Dear Mr. Anil Ambani,
I have been following your recent advertisement rather closely- ‘Power on, India on.’
It’s a visually appealing ad, so you don’t mind giving it a dekho, but it consumes a lot of air time, making it dreary and the music score, initially a ramble, slowly starts running in loops in your subconscious.
Now hitting the point- since the tall claim was advertised on every Reliance caller ringtone, commercials (TV & Radio) there has been three power cuts at my place. Three long powerless cut. Irony, I say.
Now, for petes sake Anil, why advertise and then let down your customers.

‘Advertisement hai power, Money hai power, Ambani hai power, inki power on, toh consumer gone…..’ (Inspired from your own jingle)

Nonetheless, I’m a hopeful Indian, so my mantra is Power on, India on, Hope on….

Yours fretfully,
M-Ward citizen.
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Dear Brihan Mumbai Municipal Cooperation (BMC),
There has been a public service notice pasted on the spit laden wall of the VT subway- its reads like this: WARNING- Spiting person will be fined, signed by the BMC authority.
Did I read it correctly? Spiting? I apologize but that’s hilarious. Trust me you’ve pasted this notice in the wrong place. It should be donning the second class women compartment of the local trains, a hefty fine you will collect, enough to make Mumbai- Shanghai. Those women are ferociously spiteful and rest is a din.

This brings me to critical remarks (haven’t I made them already?) anyway:
-The graphic used is not well thought of- a man spewing the most disgusting looking red, like it’s a man spewing a fountain and less like he is spitting.
-PR department of the BMC monarchy is as obsolete as their rusted brains- once in a while they come up with public notices, of this low stature, and preposterously erroneous. Spitting and Spiting- are two completely different things, my beloved BMCiets.
-The areas where these humorous, read useless posters are put up are obscure. Also some smart citizens have taken the trouble of correcting the error in the spelling.
-Since there is no mention of the fine to be charged and absence of a (I'm sure there isn’t one formed) squad assigned to actually keep a check on the abiding of the warning, spewing machines are at it without any fear.

Sincere request- appoint an outhouse PR agency, you might just get productive results.
Please stick to Marathi and Hindi; I’m sure our janta can read these if not English (which is also incorrect.) I read in the papers the other day that now you will convert all your official documents and messages in Marathi- smart move, I say!

But for the sake entertainment and passing a critique, I really don’t mind such faux pas.
Thank you BMC, you’ve always amused me and this time too, you did not let me down…
Cheers to the laughter that you evoke in the life of Bombayiets.

Yours without fail,
Fighter against spitters.

Do I love authority bashing?....

*The other day I was retuning in a rickshaw and the driver when he wasn’t acting like Michael Schumacher was painting the roads red. I strongly detest this act and like always, I couldn’t keep shut, and gave him an earful. To which he replied- "Madam yeh law drivers ke liye maaf hai." Besides being shocked at the response, I felt like giving him a good knock on his head and gagging his ever-spitting mouth. This is the attitude of the janta where people twist the warnings as per their convenience.*

Wish I could bash up these idiots too…